Manifesting, Mistakes, and Mindset Shifts
Welcome back to the LifeChangePlans Monday Blog. Today, we’re diving into a topic that many of us in the self-help world hold dear: the Law of Attraction. But we aren’t just talking about the highlights; we’re talking about the “loophole” that can lead us into situations we never saw coming.
In her book, What Type of Man? Betrayal & Abandonment, the author (writing as Loren Keeling) shares her intimate journey through toxic relationship dynamics and the spiritual techniques she used to both find love and, eventually, find herself again.
The 2009 Checklist: Be Careful What You Ask For
In 2009, she sat down with a clear intention. She wanted a partner. Following the classic manifesting technique, she defined what she wanted, wrote it down, and visualised it.
The List included qualities like:
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Kind and caring.
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Loving and generous.
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Someone to share a life with, laugh with and go on holiday two to three times per year.
The Law of Attraction worked. Almost immediately, she met a man who checked every single one of those boxes. He appeared to be the perfect match. However, as the years unfolded, the author discovered a devastating truth: The person she attracted was wearing a mask.
“I wrote out my list… I didn’t know that my dream partner checklist needed an upgrade. I attracted exactly what I asked for, but I forgot to ask for the most important things: honesty, integrity, and empathy.”
What Was Missing?
The “Loophole” in her 2009 manifestation was that she focused on how the person made her feel in the moment and their outward persona, rather than their core character. She missed the essential traits that protect a woman from coercive control and narcissistic manipulation.
When the relationship ended abruptly in 2020 with a “four-sentence discard speech,” the “generous” man she manifested was replaced by a stranger using “precarious eviction” laws to leave her financially vulnerable.
Healing Techniques: From Trauma to Transformation
Recovering from a relationship that turns out to be a “nine-year lie” requires more than just time; it requires a proactive “Life Change Plan.” Here are the techniques the author used to reclaim her power, which she details in her books and mini-courses:
1. Affirmations as a Shield
When you are told you are “disposable” or “dependent,” your self-worth takes a hit. She used daily morning affirmations to rewire her brain.
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“I am worthy. I am enough.”
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“I attract the perfect people at the right time.”
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“Something wonderful is always on the verge of happening.”
2. Documentation as Grounding
In Deceptions and Illusions, the author explains how she used a “Facts vs. Fiction” document. This wasn’t just for legal reasons; it was a self-help tool to combat gaslighting. By seeing the truth written down, she stopped doubting her own reality. Publishing in 2026.
3. Publishing the Narrative
One of the most powerful healing tools the author discusses is the act of telling your story.
“When a survivor publishes their story, they shatter that silence… Instead of being defined by the abuse, they become the authors of their own strength.”
Redefining Your “Dream Partner” List
If you are currently manifesting a change in your life, this story serves as a vital lesson. Don’t just look for the “kind and generous” surface. Look for:
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Consistency over intensity.
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Accountability over excuses.
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Integrity when no one is watching.
As the slogan on LifeChangePlans says, “Change your thinking, and it will change your life.” But make sure that thinking is grounded in protecting your peace and your future.
Support the Movement
If you found this insight helpful, consider supporting the mission of LifeChangePlans:
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Read the Book: Pick up your copy of What Type of Man? on Amazon to understand the full story of post-separation abuse and recovery.
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Useful Resources: Visit our Shop Page for more resources on navigating toxic relationships.
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Donate: Help us build the vision for a Mindfulness Retreat for survivors via our Donorbox.
