I was interviewed a few weeks ago by Lyn Smith for her Podcast Hearts Entwined.
Here I talk to Lyn about how I made the decision to write my story. My reason why is to raise awareness on the hidden emotional abuse in relationships. Also, the impact that can have on the recipient of the emotional abuse. It is my story and it is not intended to hurt or harm any individuals’ reputations or feelings.
It also raises awareness on “post-separation” abuse. How under some circumstances, especially in “coercive controlling” relationships or in cases of domestic abuse the termination of the relationship can end in conflict. Ending a relationship under any circumstances can be very difficult but it does not need to end in conflict. Many couples are able to end a relationship and move on with their lives and the situation if they are able to communicate openly and honestly with each other, it takes cooperation and negotiation to end a relationship without any conflict.
You can listen to the Interview on the Hearts Entwined Podcast Below.
‘I realised quickly that the relationship wasn’t what I thought it was’
“I’m not an angry person. It takes a lot to push me“
After the end of the relationship, I became aware of the extent of the emotional abuse I had put up with. I had written “Dear diary,” journal entries after some experiences of episodes of his behaviour towards me. I put the bad behaviour to one side, brushed it under the carpet. We often don’t realise that what they are doing or saying is abusive. You don’t see the red flags, you don’t put boundaries in place, you still see the person as your friend, lover, soul mate you make excuses for the poor behaviour and treatment of you, this deepens the extent of the trauma you experience and causes the “trauma bond”.
- Emotional trauma feels as though many pieces of a relationship have been tossed into the air, with each piece falling down at random to create chaos at any one moment.
- Emotional abuse turns us into unrecognisable versions of ourselves. It turns us from the person we knew into something more raw, strange, lost and confused.
- We are often left not just in tatters emotionally, but also in terms of practicality when it comes to being able to function effectively. The aftershocks of abuse resonate through every area of our lives.
About The Host.
Lyn Smith – (The Queen of HEARTS) – Love, Dating & Relationship Expert
Lyn’s personal story is a very inspirational and harrowing one of how she went from having unhealthy and unfulfilling relationships with men (on the back of several serious traumatic sexual assaults in her teens) to now being in a soul-fulfilling relationship which makes her feel alive, is full of passion and gives her inner peace.
She has a proven track record as a Love Solutions – Relationship Expert / Trainer / Inspirational Speaker and Best-Selling Author based upon her own vast personal research, experiential learning and training with the world’s leading industry experts.
Understanding the polarization of masculine & feminine energy resulted in her creating massive attraction and a passionate, intimate, fulfilling relationship – that inspired her to design & present her own course programmes to share these break-through relationship techniques with women across the globe.