Termination of a relationship.
A “discard” in the context of a relationship breakup refers to a sudden, abrupt, and often unexplained ending, where one partner is abruptly cut off with little to no communication or closure. It’s characterized by a lack of empathy, minimal explanation, and a feeling of being “thrown away”. This contrasts with a normal breakup where there is usually some level of communication, explanation, and attempt at closure.
Key characteristics of a discard:
Sudden and Unilateral: The decision to end the relationship is made unilaterally by one partner, often without warning or discussion.
For example. This four sentence discard speech. From the book I self-published “Post Separation Abuse. Betrayal and Abandonment. What Type of Man? A true story.
Chapter: The abrupt termination on the 27th of August. I’ve got something to tell you. I’m in love with another woman. We can remain friends if you want to remain friends. We just can’t have sex anymore.
Blindsiding: The discarded partner is caught completely off guard, as the relationship may have seemed fine or even positive prior to the discard.
Example. The month before the discard there were actions that indicated commitment. Paying for a removal company to move our personal items and some furniture from the UK to Spain.
Lack of Communication: There is little to no explanation or communication about the reasons for the breakup. In a recorded meeting, meant to discuss the financial settlement, I was informed, as he raised his voice again. QUOTE. “You have no moral high ground at all Loren, because we haven’t talked about why our relationship failed and it’s not all down to me. It’s not all down me and we don’t need to talk about it cos it’s over. (Red Flag – No closure)
Absence of Closure: The discarded partner is left without any real understanding of why the relationship ended or what went wrong.
Emotional Coldness: The discarding partner often displays a lack of empathy or remorse, appearing cold and detached.
Another example. I had wanted to talk about the financial settlement he had written two days after the discard. I found him sitting in the building we had named the games room because it housed the snooker table that I had bought for his 60th birthday. I could see he was chatting to someone over his iPad, as I walked in through the door he was sitting trimming the buds from the legally grown cannabis plants that I had been looking after for him while he was out of the country. Anyway, he looked up and then said hello and quickly followed that with “Loren this is Delia” and “Delia this is Loren” I looked at Phillip and said “You know what I’ll send you an email”, while Delia piped up in a squeaky feminine voice “Oh, I think you are doing remarkably well” I turned around and walked out. Red Flag – Introducing you to the other woman.
Feeling of Being “Thrown Away”: The discarded partner feels devalued and as if they were simply discarded rather than having a relationship ended with respect and consideration.
Why discards happen: Discarding a partner is often associated with individuals who have avoidant or narcissistic tendencies.
Avoidants: May discard due to fear of emotional intimacy, abandonment, engulfment, or rejection.
Narcissists: May discard when they have secured a new form of narcissistic supply or when they are bored with the relationship.
Impact of a discard: A discard can be a deeply traumatic experience for the person being discarded. It can lead to:
Emotional distress: Confusion, anxiety, self-doubt, and feelings of worthlessness.
Difficulty trusting others: Fear of being discarded again in future relationships.
Psychological and physical symptoms: Anxiety, depression, and even physical symptoms like stomach or heart problems.
5th Anniversary Campaign. Lifechangeplans: My Voice, My Truth.
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